I have a secret

I have a secret that no one knows... well almost no one... of course my husband has to know since I wouldn't have the secret without him.

I'll tell you how I found out this secret...

This morning, I awoke at 4:30 am as I had been restless the previous few mornings and had flown in the night before on a long flight (and thus consummed massive amounts of water)

In my morning haze, eyes barely open, I shuffled to the bathroom with my cup in one hand and my test in the other

Waited while the clock blinked on the test

Blinked

YES+ came up on the screen

Blinked again

EYES WIDE

*Holy Shit*

Ran into bedroom... said "honey it says 'YES'"

I couldn't quite get the "I'm Pregnant" words out... as if the words escaped my lips, I would wake up from the dream.

Chris, in his haze of sleepiness, sat upright and exclaimed "Are you serious?"
All I could do was nod and he was next to me in the next instant, hugging me and kissing me.
God I love that man.

It is amazing how quick the worry sets in, the analysis of what I did or ate or drank over the last two weeks and what that might mean.

The feeling of not really feeling pregnant... and having to wrap your hands around your new reality.

After the struggles of my cycles and my body, there was also persistent disbelief that this was all actually happening.

While I was swirling with emotions and worry... I asked Chris how he was feeling... "ECSTATIC" was the answer, and just what I needed to hear.

Later he admitted that he also immediately went to thinking about providing for our expanding family. Nice to hear his thoughts and know that among our shared excitement, there is also shared worry.

I am sure this is only the beginning.

Baby Brokmeier
Expected arrival 03/04/11 based on Ovulation date of 06/11/10